Finding Your Unfair Advantage in Health and Life

By Jennifer Youngren, NDTR

Some seasons of life force you to grow whether you feel ready or not. One of those seasons for me was when my daughter’s father was diagnosed with colorectal cancer while I was four months pregnant with her. I was already a mother at the time, and preparing for another child while managing his illness, which was eventually declared terminal, became one of the hardest challenges I had faced.

That time taught me lessons I could not have learned in any other way. I learned to live comfortably with less. I baked bread and cakes from scratch, cooked nearly every meal at home, and stretched my budget in ways that kept us steady. I shopped at thrift stores, mended clothes, applied for scholarships and financial aid, and found creative solutions for things I could not afford. Even small decisions, like borrowing movies from the library instead of paying for cable, gave me stability.

It was one of the most difficult periods of my life, yet also one of the most defining. It taught me that having less does not mean living less. It revealed that resilience often wears the face of resourcefulness, and that creativity can open doors even when none appear to exist. Those lessons became part of my unfair advantage, and they are what inspired me to write this piece.

We often believe success in health, career, or relationships comes down to discipline, luck, or simply facing fewer obstacles than others. The truth is different. Everyone carries an unfair advantage. It is not about perfection. It is about recognizing what you already have, reframing limits as strengths, and stacking your experiences in ways no one else can copy.

When I work with people, one of the most powerful shifts I see is when they stop asking, “What am I missing?” and begin asking, “What do I already have that I can use differently?”

Here are nine “cheat codes” to uncover your unfair advantage in health and in life.

1. Play to Your Strengths

Too often we chase the illusion of balance, trying to fix what we lack instead of maximizing what we already have. Stop chasing perfection in the areas where you struggle. True strength grows where energy flows naturally.

For me, one of those strengths was cooking. I could take simple ingredients and turn them into comfort. I found ways to stretch what I had and make it last, and it also tasted delicious. years of food service jobs and a background ion culinary taught me not only technique, but also how to stay creative under pressure, how to make something nourishing out of very little, and how to share that with others. That strength became a thread i could always return to, whether at home, or in the job market.

Reflection prompt: What do people consistently thank you for?

2. Leverage Your Environment

Your surroundings are not random. They hold opportunities if you are willing to see them. For me, that meant parks where I could be in beautiful spaces and get exercise without spending money. It meant free concerts, library programs, and community events. For years I splurged on a beach pass and got endless joy out of it, until I discovered that simply shifting my routine, getting up early, gave me free access to another beach.

Even now, I still shop at thrift stores, but I also invest in things that inspire me or help me grow, whether that is knowledge, experiences, or memories with loved ones. I talk with older generations and listen to how they got through difficult times before technology, learning tricks, hand skills, and lessons from their mistakes as well as my own. These practices remind me that time and experience are gifts that offer perspective and wisdom.

Reflection prompt: What resources in my community, including the wisdom of others, could I use more fully?

3. Turn Constraints Into Catalysts

Having less forced me to become inventive. I bought clothes secondhand and resold them online for profit. Sometimes I sold items my kids outgrew, and other times I donated what I could. I explored new interests, got crafty, and discovered the joy of music, books, and Pinterest inspiration. Those constraints shaped me into someone who could always find a way, no matter the circumstance.

Reflection prompt: What if my limits are actually shaping me into someone stronger?

4. Learn, Apply, and Then Innovate

Every master begins as a student. Growth comes from observing, learning, and applying what works. In the beginning, I followed recipes, ideas, and strategies I saw others use. I studied how people stretched their resources, how they cooked, how they managed money, and how they stayed steady through difficult times. At first it was practice, but with repetition and curiosity, I began to adapt those lessons and make them my own.

Learning from others is not weakness. It is the foundation of progress. Applying what you learn builds skill, and in time you naturally begin to add your own perspective. That is when innovation happens, not by forcing originality, but by layering what you have learned with your unique story, strengths, and creativity.

In health, this might look like learning a nutrition strategy from a coach or a workout approach from a friend, applying it consistently, and then adjusting it until it fits your body and lifestyle. In life, it may mean following the path of a mentor until you feel ready to shape it into something that reflects your own voice and values.

Reflection prompt: Who inspires me right now, and how can I apply their strategies in a way that supports my own growth?

6. Stack Your Skills

I did not need to be the best in the world at one thing. My strength came from layering different parts of myself. I learned how to cook, how to manage money, how to create with what I had, and later, I invested in academics, professional training, and writing. Each skill on its own was useful, but together they became something rare. That combination allowed me to navigate hardship, build a career, and create a life that feels intentional.

Reflection prompt: Which skills do I already have that I could layer together into something unique?

7. Use Timing Wisely

Timing often matters more than talent, and I learned to use it in small but meaningful ways. On my breaks, I step away for self care and introspection. Sometimes I go down to Port Jefferson for coffee or a quick lunch, or visit the recreation center where there is often an art exhibit upstairs. Other times I sit by the dock with a book, watch people ice skate, write, or pull a tarot card for reflection.

I spend a lot of time alone, and I find it freeing. It is hard to read a book and hold a conversation at the same time, and solitude gives me the space to recharge. Timing is not just about schedules, it is about creating the right conditions for clarity, renewal, and peace.

Reflection prompt: How can I shift the way I use my time to create more energy, clarity, or joy?

8. Optimize Energy, Not Just Time

There are only so many hours in a day, and for those working full time, nearly half of them belong to the workplace. Employers often expect all of that time and energy to be devoted to their needs, with only a few minutes here and there for yourself. While I am not saying neglect your work, I am saying that the way you protect and renew your energy matters as much as the way you manage your time.

For me, that meant becoming intentional about how I spent those small windows. Instead of simply filling silence, I started listening to podcasts or audiobooks while I worked through repetitive tasks. I chose content that was positive, educational, or inspiring because I realized much of the music I used to listen to carried negative themes. By shifting to what nourished my mind, I felt more focused, calm, and productive.

I also carried a small journal with me. If I had an idea or remembered something I needed to do, I could write it down quickly and release it, knowing I would return to it later. This small act prevented me from carrying mental clutter and allowed me to be more present both at work and outside of it.

Optimizing energy is about protecting what fuels you. It is about finding small ways to recharge even in environments that demand much from you. Over time, this practice builds resilience, clarity, and a deeper sense of balance.

Reflection prompt: When during the day do I feel most drained, and what small practices could help me restore energy in those moments?

9. Control Your Narrative

The story you tell about yourself matters. I stopped telling myself that having less meant being less. Instead, I began to see myself as clever, resilient, and resourceful. I learned boundaries, healthy skills, and how to trust my body, things I had no idea how to do before. These shifts took practice, but they became part of my identity.

With time, I also began to notice patterns in people, which helped me align with the vision I wanted for my own life. I rewrote my own headline, and that made others see me differently too.

Reflection prompt: If I rewrote my story today, what would I want the headline to be?

The Takeaway

What has carried me through was not luck, but the ability to see possibility even in difficult seasons. I learned to create opportunities, to stretch what I had, and to remain steady when life stretched me further than I thought possible. Those lessons became my edge, my unfair advantage.

Today, I live with a deep trust that money and support flow to me. I feel abundant in the things that matter most: resilience, creativity, knowledge, and the investments I have made in myself. This is wealth that only grows richer with time.

I also welcome change with open hands. When one chapter closes, I see it as space opening for something new, something aligned, something even better. Endings reveal beginnings, and every closed door is an invitation to step into a brighter room.

Your unfair advantage may look different from mine, but it is already within you. It lives in your resilience, your creativity, and your story. The more you recognize it, the more life rises to meet you.

✨ Constraints transform into catalysts. Stories unfold as strategies. And every turn of the page brings you closer to the life you are creating.